Firstly, I want to thank everyone for hanging in there. There was a lot that has happened over the last 3+ months, but we endured. This Round Up is special. Next week, people will get crucified as they exit the playoffs and there will even be some coverage of the losers bracket. But today? Today is a celebration for everyones efforts, participation, and patience. People need to be celebrated, they need to feel good about what they’re doing. Ultimately it’s about returning the league to a state of normalcy for the first time in a long time. No more shit talk, no more threats of collusion or extortion. But…. You know what normal is to me? I ain’t see normal since I was 6 years old. Normal is seeing the commissioner ride up to my house, dragging my newly acquired players out of my roster and tying me to a pole, shoving a beer to shotgun in my mouth so hard they bust my teeth, then commish reverses the trade, knocking me out of contention. That’s what normal is to me. Didn’t give a fuck about no commish then… Don’t give a fuck about no commish now. At the end of the day… I want my 20%.
We have to start off with the person who I think has flown under the radar. He’s taking his lumps and his bruises but he never gave up. HE always saw the vision. This team is going to drag you into the trenches, knuckles in the dirt and get north and south type of team, real grinders, grit personified, sneaky athletic team, hard hat and lunch pale kind of team. Legacy could have mailed it in but instead he won 4 of his last 6 games and 3 of his last 4. 4 of his final 6 games were hilariously decided by 5 points or less and 3 of his last 6 were decided by an even funnier 2 points or less. Legacy easily could have won 5 of his last 6 and that needs to be commended. I see you Legacy. I get it. That right there is $25,000 Alpaca and I’ll be sure to blot any mess that’s made with some club soda. Hats off to you, young man.
Had to dig deep for this one but there’s some gold in them hills. Losing 6 in a row to end the season is tough, but post draft this guy was #1 in the power rankings and was 3-1 and 5-3 at a few points in the season. the ultimate killer for Moxie was that his players were just on really, really, bad teams, but let’s not overlook the fact that he arguably did draft the best out of every one here, and someone with an for that kind of talent out of the gates stands a chance and hope may be eternal. Moxie doesn’t walk into the club with a new $1000 suit. Moxie knows that’s a clown suit. That’s a costume, with a big sign on it that says “collusion”. He’s not too loud, he’s not making too much noise. He knows the loudest one in the room is the weakest one in the room.
Former league champion, has never missed the playoffs despite overcoming multiple abysmal starts. He’s down but never out, but if anyone has an excuse this year, look no further than the onslaught of injuries that Zack had to go through. Diggs and Godwin are perennial 15-20+ point players. That’s a lot of production to lose in the span of 2 weeks. Once he boasted a roster of Burrow, Gibbs, Chubba, Godwin, Diggs, Najee and Lockett. He fought his way back to 5-5 and held the last spot in the playoffs with just a few weeks left. Had he just played the FA market I think we can agree that even down 2 stars Zack would have likely made the playoffs given the facts tha he only needed 3 more wins and surely Gibbs and Burrow could shoulder the load. But that’s what happens when you come up with preposterous rules to bite the hand that feeds you. Now you come into my diner asking for 20% even though that eats my whole margin. How about a .45 to the skull in the middle of the street? It’s my neighborhood now. I don’t work for nobody.
Off to a hot 2-0 start and then the wheels sort of fell off. It doesn’t quite make sense becasue this team really did put together a good roster. Anchored by Lamar and Jayden Daniels, obviously this team went all in on the QB and RB positions, but the Jets are a dumpster fire and couldn’t figure out how to use Breece Hall, Aaron Jones is going to have the worst fantasy 1k+ yard season of all time he really is an after thought in a surprisingly pass heavy Vikings O with Darnold, The Raiders blew up and couldn’t feed Adams the ball and he’s not having success on a bad Jets team, Mark Andrews was a ghost in the first half of the year, Zamir White is a nobody despite the Raiders saying they were all in on him going into the year and Rashid Shaheed was having a great year until he got injured for the year. On paper Kev made all the right moves but general team performance, underperforming and over performing, have really thrown this roster into a head wind that is a bit of a head scratcher. Clearly capable of putting together good names, look for Kev to bounce back next year and learning from this season. His theory has always been to stay the course and to not lose the locker room. He’s got “Harlem”. He took care of “Harlem” so “Harlem” is going to take care of him. Admirable.
If not for Tua going down for 4 games, I think we can all agree that this team would be vying for a playoff spot given how much of a powerhouse Achane is. Also, Rashee Rice going down, Deebo being a bust, Brian Thomas on an awful Jags team, Devin Singletary getting supplanted by a rookie RB, Sam LaPorta having a down year. It’s a bag of misfortune but Taran wasn’t wrong. If injuries didn’t force Taran to give up Montgomery, then I think he could have easily contended for anther 3 wins and a playoff spot. Similar to Zack, it’s a matter of being patient through injuries and leaning on the FA market to weather the storm. Of course easier said than done because the FA market cna be a baron place throughout parts of the season. Taran is an honest man though. As honest as someone finding a $1million in unmarked cash and giving it up. Unfortunately this league is full of piranhas and nice guys finish last.
I’ve said my piece about Caden. Total DUD(insky). https://ssfl.us/wsj-30-for-30-the-curious-case-of-caden/
But we can all be a bit nice to him moving forward since he’s on full blown suicide watch after missing the playoffs by 2 points.
What a roller coaster of a season. Has any team had to sweat it out more than this guy? Seemingly over performed in the first half of the year by getting off to a 5-1 start and winning 5 straight, he then lost 4 of 5 and made the playoffs on a technicality. Not many lose 2 in a row to make the playoffs, but that’s the name of the game isn’t it? Survive and advance? Losing Nico Collins and CMC for almost the whole year and having Bucky Irving and McConkey sidelined is almost insurmountable, but Dave leaned heavily on Trey McBrides career year and the surprising play of Tony Pollard and Drake London to get him over the hump. What a tough season but Dave literally did just enough to get into the playoffs where anything can happen. His only regret is giving up on Juan Jennings. Regret though can be just enough to see an early round exit. No regret is bigger than giving up on the 49ers WR1, not even wearing a chinchilla jacket and having better seats to the fight than Dominic Cattano and having Joe Louis shake your hand in front of God and everybody. I’ll say it again: Survive and Advance.
He wheeled and “dealed”, bought and sold fools gold, but he stayed true to his bell cows and that’s why he’s in the playoffs. Winners of 4 straight and eclipsing 160 points in 3 of his last 4, Gault stayed true to Mike Evans, Puca, and Kyren. Some savvy moves netted him Josh Allen and Jerry Jeudy, which, well who saw that coming? Also, Deandre Swift gave Gault a nice bump in the middle of the season when he was going off to help keep him afloat while Evans was sidelined with a hamstring injury. When you have Josh Allen and Puka, you’re always going to be in it and now he’s done his part to make it to the playoffs and overcoming a 40% chance of missing in the final week of the season. At the end of the day it’s about making the playoffs and making some noise. I don’t care what you call it, put a choke-hold on the motherfucker and call it Blue Dog Shit. I call it a successful season.
Ha Ha…. My man… It felt good avenging my week 3 loss with a 160 point trouncing and defeating boss for the 4th time this year, but being dealt 4 losses wasn’t enough. The Deadman rises. A very pedestrian 3-2 start that avalanched into a 3-4 record was swiftly turned around when he went on a 3 game win streak and averaged 145 points in doing so. He lost 3 of his final 4 to crawl into the playoffs but the emergence of Tyrone Tracy, Mclaurin’s career season, Njoku’s franchise record setting year, and Mixons career year have really propelled him into the 4th seed. Boss is wealthy, but is he white man wealthy? Does he work for himself or does he work for rich old white men? Will he croak in a super market or will he rise to prominence? All in all, a pretty good year.
It’s hard to ignore this teams meteoric rise to the 3rd seed. After a 2-6 start, Luke won 5 of his final 6 matchups to squeak into the playoffs. His loss in week 13 was nearly a death blow, but he’s eclipsed 169 points 3 times in his last 6 bouts and has the league record for most points scored in a game at 202.13. Not a lot of teams can score 202 points 1 week and the next week score 79. Truly the JR Smith of FF but if he’s hot, there’s a likelihood of him winning as evidenced by his final 6 games. After all, when you’ve got Chubba Hubbard having a career resurgence, Jamaar Chase going nuclear week in and week out, Kelce having a very quiet but solid year, and Courtland Sutton having an all-pro caliber year, yeah, you can hang with everyone. The key to all of this is the erratic play of Mahommes and Jonathan Taylor. Can they steady the ship to give Luke a more well rounded roster or is truly boom or bust? Nonetheless it’s impressive to be 7-7 and second in PF by just 34 points (!!!). See, ya are what ya are in this world. That’s either one of two things: Either you’re somebody, or you ain’t nobody. Luke’s lived in both worlds and lived to tell the tale. Impressive.
As for this last team… The model of consistency. The cream of the crop. The mainstay. The big swinging dick. Nobody owns Bryon, though. Because Bryon owns his own company. And Bryons company sells a product that’s better than the competition at a price that’s lower than the competition. Well, he’s certainly sold me. #1 in PF, multiple 5+ game win streaks. Least amount of transactions in the ENTIRE league and only 1 trade… This guy knows value when he sees it and his proven it time and time again. He studies the advanced analytics, he’s got The Athletic subscription, He’s ALL IN. I don’t know if anyone else dedicated more time, energy, and resources to having a successful year, and success would be an understatement because he’s primed for long and steady success without massive fluctuation. He’s proven to put in the work that nobody else has and it’s shown. I’m close to crowning him now…. My man….
Oh…. wait.. there’s one more team… This is my home. My country. Latte Larry’s don’t run from nobody. This is America.