The Power Rankings are aware that there may be bigger news around the country today, and that makes Week 10 the perfect time for us to focus on the positive.
Our regular readers know that the comments on this piece each week trend away from our better angels as a society, so this week my challenge to everyone is to be nice. And I’m going to start by saying something nice about every team no matter their place in these rankings. On top of that, I’ll make a commitment to you to respond to every positive post left in the group chat this week. Questions are fine, even encouraged, as long as they are civil. We can do this, people.
1. Kittle School Shooters (7-2) 💲💲
Last week: 2
Playoff Chance: 99%
Week 9: Defeated Amon-Ra’Merica
Something Nice: 106 points PF higher than the second-best team
Shooters had no hesitation making light work of Amon-Ra’Merica in Week 9. Perhaps it was payback for the shit talk? 4 of the 9 active players scored 30+ points. George Kittle was able to rest up with the bye week but that did not stop Shooters from scoring over 200 points. Everybody appears healthy. Shooters will look to continue firing on the GOONERS in Week 10 who are looking to break a three-loss streak.
Up next: GOONERS
2. It was you, Zach Robinson (7-2) 💲💲
Last week: 1
Playoff Chance: 98%
Week 9: Defeated USA Eagle Slayers
Something Nice: 2 games ahead of the third place has all but guaranteed a first-round bye
Somebody call the fire department, because this club is on fire! Six game win streak. This matchup however was a low scoring affair, and one many would have changed the channel by the end of the first half. That doesn’t negate the fact Kirk threw for three touchdowns. However, if it wants to make it to a seven-game win streak, something must be done about Kyle Pitts and his usage, or lack thereof. Can Zach Robinson close the door on Gordon’s playoff chances and eliminate him in week 10?
Up next: Gordon’s Last Joint
3. GOONERS (5-4) 💲
Last Week: 3
Playoff Chance: 64%
Week 9: Lost to ERROR 404
Something Nice: Derrick Henry’s 30s
Derrick Henry will turn 31 the day before the finals Sunday of the regular season. He doesn’t seem to have noticed. After scoring 31.3 points in Week 9, he is ranked RB1 on the season. Unfortunately, between him and JSN combining for 69 points the rest of the roster didn’t produce much. It was a close matchup between GOONERS and Error 404, but every blind squirrel eventually finds a nut. The three game losing streak is extremely concerning. And with Zach Robinson next up in Week 10, can GOONERS snap the streak and turn this season around before it’s too late?
Up next: It was you, Zach Robinson
4. Hurts Donut (5-4) 🍺
Last week: 6
Playoff Chance: 83%
Week 9: Defeated Trapa-Hall-ics Mixtapes
Something Nice: The ROI of Deebo Samuel
Don’t call it a comeback! Hurts Donuts is now 4th in the Power Rankings and two games back from first place. Incredible display of grit. No panic trades, just well calculated moves to win each week. Justin Jefferson never needed dealt. Jalen Hurts continues to get the job done, and steal redzone touches from Saquon Barkley—to School Shooters’ dismay. Week 10 is a big matchup between Hurts Donuts and Cowher’s Team, one that will surely shake up the rankings. Will Hurts get the job done?
Up next: It was Cowher’s Team
5. USA Eagle Slayers (5-4) 🍺
Last week: 4
Playoff Chance: 71%
Week 9: Lost to Gordon’s Last Joint
Something Nice: CMC is back from IR
Week 9 turned out to be extremely underwhelming. 94 points is simply not good enough even against the bottom ranked clubs. Kyler Murray only scoring 6 points in a blowout against Chicago is bizarre. Nico Collins, CMC, and Jameson returning to the lineup couldn’t have come any sooner, as this three-loss streak could not have come at a worse time. Slayers turns to Amon-Ra’Merica who is also coming off a loss.
Up next: Amon-Ra’Merica
6. It Was Cowher’s Team (5-4) 🍺
Last week: 5
Playoff Chance: 45%
Week 9: Lost to Land of Misfit Toys
Something Nice: Broncos D/ST even after Week 9
Coming off a season high score and crashing and burning in Week 9 into the Weekly Low Score is a tale as old as time in SSFL. Diontae Johnson was not prepared for Week 9, and didn’t receive a single target. Mark Andrews continues to be a fantasy rollercoaster. Broncos D/ST with -5 points is gut-wrenching, given that they have been ranked number one all season. It was an all-around rough week. Fantasy football is all about the valleys and the peaks though. Shake it off and put Week 9 in the rearview, as Hurts Donuts is up next who also is 5-4 and making a push for the playoffs.
Up next: Hurts Donuts
7.Amon-Ra’merica (4-5) 💲
Last week: 7
Playoff Chance: 38%
Week 9: Lost to Kittle School Shooters
Something Nice: Middle of the pack even with the toughest schedule
It doesn’t matter how well your club performs if your opponent is putting up 200+ fantasy points. Achane went nuclear in Week 9. Geno Smith lit it up in the second half, even throwing 3 interceptions. Kareem Hunt was an excellent acquisition. 30 points above the projected score is a reason to keep your head up. Keep the same momentum rolling into Week 10, and Ebony Slayers will be falling to a four game losing streak.
Up next: USA Eagle Slayers
8. Land of Misfit Toys (3-6) 🍺
Last week: 10
Playoff Chance: 16%
Week 9: Defeated It was Cowher’s Team
Something Nice: They just don’t quit
When Diggs and Godwin were lost to injury, it looked like Misfit Toy’s season was over, but notching a win over Cowher’s Team did enough to keep Misfit Toy’s hopes alive. It certainly helped that Cowher’s Team put up the Weekly Low Score of 82 points. Nevertheless, there is a bottleneck of four 5-4 teams and three 4-5 teams in contention for four of the six remaining playoff teams. With five remaining regular season matchups, Misfit will need to start stacking wins and putting up as many points as possible, as it is possible it will likely come down to PF. That begins in Week 10 with the 2-7 ERROR 404.
Up next: ERROR 404
9. Trapa-Hall-ics Mixtapes (4-5) 🍺
Last week: 8
Playoff Chance: 35%
Week 9: Lost to Hurts Donuts
Something Nice: Cade Otton has become WR1 in Tampa Bay
Week 9 is a heartbreaker given that Ekeler and Tillman were sitting on the bench, and costed the matchup. Pittman getting only one reception in Week 9 is unacceptable. However, Lamar Jackson is playing at an MVP level once again, and will continue to keep this club competitive. And the Cade Otton waiver wire grab is turning to be the steal of the league. Better days are ahead with The Cursed One up next.
Up next: The Cursed One
10. The Cursed One (3-6) 💲 🍺🍺
Last week: 11
Playoff Chance: 24%
Week 9: Defeated Gordon’s Last Joint
Something Nice: The overall vibes
This one had to feel good. Everything went Cursed One’s way in Week 9. They put up a dominant performance fueling a blowout win over Gordon’s Last Joint, Cursed One’s bitter Fantasy rival. Patrick Mahomes finally came back to fantasy relevance. Jk Dobbins torched the Browns. Kelce looks like himself again. Everybody did their jobs and put an ass whooping on Gordon’s club. This roster is best in the league on paper and is scary if it continues to play like it did in Week 9. Siting outside of playoffs through Week 9, does the Cursed One have enough juice to make a push for the one of the remaining spots for playoffs?
Up next: Trapa-Hall-ics Mixtapes
11. Gordon’s Last Joint (3-6) 💲
Last week: 9
Playoff Chance: 23%
Week 9: Lost to The Cursed One
Something Nice: Alvin Kamara carrying the load
This is a tough pill to swallow. On one hand, Gordon’s Last Joint did score a respectable 124 points, and on the other, lost to The Cursed One in part due to trades that Gordon found rather lopsided. Even with Josh Allen, this was no match up for the Cursed One. Zach Ertz is not fantasy dependable. Kamara can only take this club so far. If there is any hope for this club, Week 10 poses a key matchup against the Super Zach Robinson.
Up next: It was you, Zach Robinson
12. ERROR 404 (2-7) 🍺🍺 💲
Last week: 12
Playoff Chance: 4%
Week 9: Defeated GOONERS
Something Nice: Chase Brown stock rising with Moss’s injury
There was a chance in which ERROR 404 could have sabotaged its chances with winning with Worthy going negative, but in the end it didn’t matter. Other clubs are very happy with ERROR 404 beating GOONERS, knocking them to 5-4 and making the final four available playoff spots open. Chase Brown will continue to get more touches with the loss of Zack Moss. Will ERROR 404 continue wrecking club’s playoff aspirations with Misfit Toys making a late season push?
Up next: Land of Misfit Toys
