1. Kittle School Shooters (6-1) 💵
○ Last week: 1
○ Playoff Chance: 96%
○ Week 7: Defeated USA Eagle Slayers
○ At some point, somebody has to come for the reigningSSFL champion, right? Kittle School Shooters are now sitting pretty with a one game advantage on the rest of the league. However, Week 7 was not pretty. Metcalf and Kittle might be sidelined for an extended period of time. Zay Flowers had one reception for 11 yards. Tank Dell put up a goose egg. If Shooters wants to maintain its number one position in the power rankings, it’s going to need to need to score more points. That begins with this week as Zach Robinson’s Future Cell Mate has had this matchup circled on its calendar this entire season. Be prepared for fireworks, folks.
○ Up next: Zach Robinsons Future Cell Mate
2. GOONERS (5-2) 💵
○ Last Week: 2
○ Playoff Chance: 88%
○ Week 7: Lost to Trapa-Hall-ics Mixtapes
○ Gooners got gooned in Week 7. Reek desperately needs Tua back. JSN has 3 receptions. That is just not going to cut it. King Henry cannot continued carrying this club on his back. Simply put, this week comes down to inefficient club management. Too many points were left on the bench. This could have easily been a win for GOONERS had they rostered the right players. And with Gordon’s Last Joint coming off its season high score, GOONERS will need to take a step back and re-evaluate who is starting.
○ Up next: It was Cowher’s Team
3. USA Eagle Slayers (5-2) 🍺
○ Last week: 3
○ Playoff Chance: 84%
○ Week 7: Lost to Kittle School Shooters
○ The lights were too bright for Eagle Slayers in Week 7, as the win streak came to a halt against the School Shooters.Javonte scored a quarter of the overall points on Thursday night getting the Slayers off to a nice start. That all came crashing down on the Sunday early slate as four players combined for less than 20 points. Bucky Irving sitting on the bench is likely what lost this week in the low scoring affair. Onto Gordon’s Last Joint, who’s riding the hot hand.
○ Up next: Gordon’s Last Joint
4. Zach Robinsons Future Cell Mate (5-2) 💵
○ Last week: 4
○ Playoff Chance: 90%
○ Week 7: Defeated ERROR 404
Future Cell Mate has put itself in the right position. Week after week, trade after trade, it has finally come down to this. One game back from the top of the Power Rankings. A chance to take a shot at the King. This is the Cell Mate’s Super Bowl. Making light work of ERROR 404, Future Cell Mate has his eyes set on Week 8. They knew Pickens, Jacobs, and Njoku were going to take care of business. All that mattered was Week 8. Well, it’s here, gentlemen. Buckle up.
Up next: Kittle School Shooters
5. It Was Cowher’s Team (4-3)
○ Last week: 7
○ Playoff Chance: 59%
○ Week 7: Defeated Amon-Ra’merica
○ Never would anybody would have imagined that Baker Mayfield would be starting over Josh Allen. Cowher’s Team did though! What a great managerial move. This team has been hot and cold, making questionable roster decisions, but look who is laughing now. Mark Andrews being the latest acquisition from the waiver wire could be Cowher’s latest big brain move.
○ Up next: GOONERS
6. Honest Abe’s Trades (3-4) 🍺💵
○ Last week: 9
○ Playoff Chance: 21%
○ Week 7: Defeated Makin’ Moore Mooney
○ Started from the bottom, now we here! Honest Abe continues rising up the Power Rankings. If the season ended today, Abe would be punching his ticket to the dance. Now how is that for starting 1-4? Hop on Gibbs back because he’s taking Honest Abe to the Promise Land. Godwin going down with a serious injury is likely going to hurt. Make no mistake, because DJ Moore is here to save the day. Big match up against another middling 3-4 club in Trapa-Hall-ics Mixtape, who is trying to get back to .500. With a third of the clubs at 3-4, this matchup will have big implications on the Power Rankings in Week 9.
○ Up next: Trapa-Hall-ics Mixtapes
7. Amon-Ra’merica (3-4) 💵
○ Last week: 5
○ Playoff Chance: 43%
○ Week 7: Lost to It Was Cowher’s Team
Deebo going down early in the first quarter set Amon-Ra’Merica back to 1776. Only St. Brown has lived up to expectations. Brian Thomas could be the Fantasy winner of the year, given his 102 pick of the draft. However, Achane and Singletary are just not getting the job done. And given the current talent on the Waiver Wire, this club will continue to hover just outside of playoff contention. It also doesn’t help given that the rest of clubs put up their season highs against Amon-Ra, given that they have the highest points against in the league. Expect a bounce back win against ERROR 404, who currently has only one win this season.
Up next: ERROR 404
8. Hurts Donut (3-4) 🍺
○ Last week: 6
○ Playoff Chance: 42%
○ Week 7: Lost to Gordon’s Last Joint
○ It has been a tough season so far for Hurts Donuts. I am sure it hurts, don’t it? Kareem has been a great pick up for this club. Joe Mixon is back and mightier than ever. Gordon’s Last Joint had to have a season high game just to beat this club. It’s time to drop the Jets D/ST, as it has now likely costed Hurts Donuts two losses in a row. Pacheco couldn’t get off the IR soon enough, because Hurts Donuts needs reinforcements if it wants to make a push for the playoffs.
○ Up next: Makin’ Moore Mooney
9. Trapa-Hall-ics Mixtapes (3-4) 🍺
○ Last week: 10
○ Playoff Chance: 34%
○ Week 7: Defeated GOONERS
○ A desperately needed win against GOONERS. Lamar Jackson continues to play at an MVP level and carry this team. Cade Otton was a fantastic pickup off the waiver wire as it has been a tight end carousel for Trapa-Hall-ics. Ekeler is going to need to step it up if Mixtapes is ready to move into the top six against the middling of the pack Honest Abe. Breece Hall should have his way with the NE Defense, so lean on him.
○ Up next: Honest Abe’s Trades
10. Makin’ Moore Mooney (2-5) 💵🍺🍺
○ Last week: 8
○ Playoff Chance: 17%
○ Week 7: Lost to Honest Abe’s Trades
Woof. Two weeks in a row in which Makin’ Moore Mooney has scored the lowest points in the league. This is beginning to get ugly as this club is trending in the wrong direction. Courtland Sutton with a goose egg. There is no help from the bench. The highest scorer was the Philadelphia Eagles D/ST. Hurts Donuts is pissed off the world and is looking to take its aggression out on Makin’ Moore Mooney in Week 8.
○ Up next: Hurts Donuts
11. Gordon’s Last Joint (2-5) 💵
○ Last week: 12
○ Playoff Chance: 15%
○ Week 7: Defeated Hurts Donuts
○ There’s a pulse! Just as the season was slipping away, Gordon’s Last Joint traded away CeeDee Lamb and was able to capitalize on a nice return! This was a big showing against Hurts Donuts, who came into Week 7 eager for a win. That didn’t stop Gordon’s Last Joint as they sailed to victory and put together a convincing win, netting the high score of the week. Can they keep this up against the 5-2 Eagle Slayers, who continues to have the lowest points against?
○ Up next: USA Eagle Slayers
12. ERROR 404 (1-6) 🍺💵
○ Last week: 11
○ Playoff Chance: 4%
○ Week 7: Lost to Zach Robinsons Future Cell Mate
○ Another tough outing for ERROR 404. CJ Stroud has a case of the Sophomore Slump, especially with Nico out of the lineup. Halfway through the regular season and the ERROR 404 has all but been ruled out of the post-season, it’s time to start mock drafting for the 2025-2026 season. Better luck next year.
○ Up next: Amon-Ra’merica